A parent's view of marriage

I dunno what got into my parents and grandma last night but they ganged up on me at the dinner table, dropping all kind of hints. Have my mum been reading my blogs? Oh crap, die lah.

Their reasons why I shouldn't wait 'too long'?

1. I'm not getting any younger

2. Shirley (my gf) is not getting any younger

3. I don't wanna get lonely when I grow old

4. My parent's house is too big and quiet and they want the pitter patter of small feet to liven it up

Hmmm. How to win an argument against a win-win-win proposal. Actually I'm not against the idea at all but what flew out their window was this little thing called timing. It seemed that temporary insanity got to them faster than it got to me.

I don't blame parents for treating their children like perishables in a vegetable market. You know, move 'em out while they're fresh. 3 out of 4 points raised by the gang had to do with freshness but what I found amusing was why they didn't care to say why its so important in the first place. Wanna take a stab at it?

Well let me cut to the chase. If you're gonna breed like a bunny rabbit, they know its best to do it before a certain age.

Lets face it. No man can 'get it up' past a certain age. No lady wants to suckle a baby when her tits are sagging. And that's the cold hard truth that they conspire to keep from you, or at least what they hope you'll figure out between the lines.

It just goes to strengthen my point that marriage is nothing more than a ruse for sex, sex and sex. After all they know very well that babies are an incidental by-product because you can get a baby without sex, adoption being one way. But to a parent, its all about leaving a piece of yourself behind, a living legacy. And don't get me started about why that's so important either.

I don't buy the argument that marriage prevents loneliness at old age and my parents know it. We've seen enough at my elder uncles and aunts to know that its not something you can guarantee.

Like I said, I'm not against marriage but I'd like to do it on reasonable terms. The time I get hitched will be when I'm reasonably certain that I've reigned in my predatory instinct, not when I'm in the thick of it.

Now how do I explain all that to my parents.