I'm about to get on a long overseas flight yet again and Bryan's Cafe won't be updated for a week. I should be back 30th April. Till then take care, be good and always remember to wear protection boys and girls :P
Bryan
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007
The Virginia Tech incident: My take
To some, Cho is the aggressor. To others he is the victim. I think he's both.
From CNN you could see all the signs of someone who buckled under peer pressure starting from high school where he was teased and told to go back to China (he's korean). Who knows what untold stories there are, probably from elementary school about how he may have been bullied for being different. You could see it in his voice and facial expression from his home video.
The typical response from social leaders there is that well everybody gets bullied, big deal, so why must he respond so differently?
Hmm... where have I heard that before. Oh yeah, I once went to my internet service provider to complain about poor line quality and was told we dish the same crap to a million customers so why should you be any different.
These people assume everyone's like everyone else. They don't recognize people as individuals. That's how bullies operate, by depersonalizing their victims. That's why they can stick it to many people without any conscience.
I'm not saying that Cho is right in his bloody rampage. Taking someone's life under whatevere excuse is always wrong (and so is the Virginia law allowing people to buy guns without a waiting period which is supposed to filter out angry gun buyers) but what I'm asking is is society totally innocent in the making of Cho?
In his videos, he told of the aggravating conditions where felt victimized and pushed over the edge for things he had no control over like his skin colour and lack of wealth. He's clearly spelling out the stimulus and the response, the cause and effect, albeit from his little isolated mind which wouldn't have mattered under most circumstances. Except that it did matter as the middle-class community eventually found out.
The psychologists are now falling over each other in their response, saying that bullying is normal, implying that Cho should have taken it like a man. I was stunned. In a young mind, reality is painfully simple. Everyone suffers from bullying but some handle it better than others. But from what the psychologists are saying, if you can't handle bullying, you must be a crazy nut and a potentially dangerous person. And of course not a word is said about the bullies themselves.
Knowing the Americans, they will spend weeks on tearful eulogies about how beautiful and full of life were the victims who died (even though some may have been total assholes in real life) but very few will be introspective about why Cho became what he became. Its always a lot easier to blame than to ponder and even if they did, it'll just be a matter of academics and certainly not society-changing. Bullying is just part of growing up in America.
Personally being US-schooled, I've had people yell "hey chink" and fling garbage at me from moving cars simply because I'm Asian. It didn't affect me then and it doesn't affect me now. I learned to accept that its just human nature to feel threatened when someone different is in your midst and for you to be sidelined or ejected for it.
But if society wants to take this sort of hate as the norm, then it should also accept as norm that there will always be a one-in-a-million someone who loses it and kills half the town as society pushes him over the edge. I am in a sense puzzled by the outrage. Sadness yes but surprise no. To me its all just part of the impersonal, natural balancing mechanism of societies that includes disease and natural disasters.
One thing for sure, someone is going to make a movie out of this.
From CNN you could see all the signs of someone who buckled under peer pressure starting from high school where he was teased and told to go back to China (he's korean). Who knows what untold stories there are, probably from elementary school about how he may have been bullied for being different. You could see it in his voice and facial expression from his home video.
The typical response from social leaders there is that well everybody gets bullied, big deal, so why must he respond so differently?
Hmm... where have I heard that before. Oh yeah, I once went to my internet service provider to complain about poor line quality and was told we dish the same crap to a million customers so why should you be any different.
These people assume everyone's like everyone else. They don't recognize people as individuals. That's how bullies operate, by depersonalizing their victims. That's why they can stick it to many people without any conscience.
I'm not saying that Cho is right in his bloody rampage. Taking someone's life under whatevere excuse is always wrong (and so is the Virginia law allowing people to buy guns without a waiting period which is supposed to filter out angry gun buyers) but what I'm asking is is society totally innocent in the making of Cho?
In his videos, he told of the aggravating conditions where felt victimized and pushed over the edge for things he had no control over like his skin colour and lack of wealth. He's clearly spelling out the stimulus and the response, the cause and effect, albeit from his little isolated mind which wouldn't have mattered under most circumstances. Except that it did matter as the middle-class community eventually found out.
The psychologists are now falling over each other in their response, saying that bullying is normal, implying that Cho should have taken it like a man. I was stunned. In a young mind, reality is painfully simple. Everyone suffers from bullying but some handle it better than others. But from what the psychologists are saying, if you can't handle bullying, you must be a crazy nut and a potentially dangerous person. And of course not a word is said about the bullies themselves.
Knowing the Americans, they will spend weeks on tearful eulogies about how beautiful and full of life were the victims who died (even though some may have been total assholes in real life) but very few will be introspective about why Cho became what he became. Its always a lot easier to blame than to ponder and even if they did, it'll just be a matter of academics and certainly not society-changing. Bullying is just part of growing up in America.
Personally being US-schooled, I've had people yell "hey chink" and fling garbage at me from moving cars simply because I'm Asian. It didn't affect me then and it doesn't affect me now. I learned to accept that its just human nature to feel threatened when someone different is in your midst and for you to be sidelined or ejected for it.
But if society wants to take this sort of hate as the norm, then it should also accept as norm that there will always be a one-in-a-million someone who loses it and kills half the town as society pushes him over the edge. I am in a sense puzzled by the outrage. Sadness yes but surprise no. To me its all just part of the impersonal, natural balancing mechanism of societies that includes disease and natural disasters.
One thing for sure, someone is going to make a movie out of this.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
A man thinks about sex every 52 seconds. True or false?
A man will think about sex every 52 seconds while the subject tends to cross women's minds just once a day according to this report.
Do you believe it?
For me, the researcher is wrong. Actually man thinks about sex ALL the time. He just doesn't realize it.
Let me illustrate. Aherm.
You see, whatever man does, it is connected to enhancing the opportunity to pass along his genes. Nice cars, clothes, condo, make-up, being slim and gym-fit are all meant to impress, to send a message that you are nice and worthy of a shag. You slog at the uni and then look for a job so that you can afford to have these images.
The battles you fight on the job are just efforts to protect your sex life because lets face it, no money no sex.
You eat nice food and take vitamins because nobody wants to shag with you if you look frail and sickly. You buy a PC so that you can go to Friendster and look for sex. You frequent a club because they got hot chicks there. Even blogging is connected to sex. I might blog because making new friends boosts my confidence and with some fame I can become a celebrity at parties. And then girls will fling themselves at me and say they wanna have my baby.
And its not just you and me. The whole blardy society - friends, family, co-workers, teachers, are all urging us to have sex. If you don't believe it, try telling people you're 30-something and single. Then watch them rush over and ask when are you going to get married lah, why wait so long lah, etc etc.
So there, I have proven that everyone, young or old, man or woman, has sex on their minds all the time. We're all obsessed with boobs, cheebyes and kukuciaus and every single thing we do is somehow or rather connected to a shag. That's why I have a lot of respect for the Japanese who celebrate the giant penis festival. I can say they are very honest about life. Here's a picture of these honest people.
That's why I think the researcher should fly over to Malaysia or Japan and conduct his research there.
Do you believe it?
For me, the researcher is wrong. Actually man thinks about sex ALL the time. He just doesn't realize it.
Let me illustrate. Aherm.
You see, whatever man does, it is connected to enhancing the opportunity to pass along his genes. Nice cars, clothes, condo, make-up, being slim and gym-fit are all meant to impress, to send a message that you are nice and worthy of a shag. You slog at the uni and then look for a job so that you can afford to have these images.
The battles you fight on the job are just efforts to protect your sex life because lets face it, no money no sex.
You eat nice food and take vitamins because nobody wants to shag with you if you look frail and sickly. You buy a PC so that you can go to Friendster and look for sex. You frequent a club because they got hot chicks there. Even blogging is connected to sex. I might blog because making new friends boosts my confidence and with some fame I can become a celebrity at parties. And then girls will fling themselves at me and say they wanna have my baby.
And its not just you and me. The whole blardy society - friends, family, co-workers, teachers, are all urging us to have sex. If you don't believe it, try telling people you're 30-something and single. Then watch them rush over and ask when are you going to get married lah, why wait so long lah, etc etc.
So there, I have proven that everyone, young or old, man or woman, has sex on their minds all the time. We're all obsessed with boobs, cheebyes and kukuciaus and every single thing we do is somehow or rather connected to a shag. That's why I have a lot of respect for the Japanese who celebrate the giant penis festival. I can say they are very honest about life. Here's a picture of these honest people.
That's why I think the researcher should fly over to Malaysia or Japan and conduct his research there.
Saturday, April 14, 2007
The trouble with testosterone
According to this British report, the sight of a pretty woman is enough to throw a man's decision-making skills into disarray, making him more likely to accept unfair offers then men who are not easily aroused. The higher the testosterone levels, the more vulnerable he is to such stimulus.
I can vouch for that. My good buddies who are forever distracted by big boobies can never seem to keep a job. No wonder lar.
What I didn't know was that you can measure testosterone levels by comparing the length of your index finger and ring finger. According to the report, if your ring finger is longer, you have a high testosterone level.
(Note to self: date a woman with an exceedingly long ring finger and be prepared there could be something else "down there".)
The report also mentioned that the researchers were unable to find any visual stimulus which will affect women's behaviour.
I guess they haven't tried a Sale 50% Off sign.
I can vouch for that. My good buddies who are forever distracted by big boobies can never seem to keep a job. No wonder lar.
What I didn't know was that you can measure testosterone levels by comparing the length of your index finger and ring finger. According to the report, if your ring finger is longer, you have a high testosterone level.
(Note to self: date a woman with an exceedingly long ring finger and be prepared there could be something else "down there".)
The report also mentioned that the researchers were unable to find any visual stimulus which will affect women's behaviour.
I guess they haven't tried a Sale 50% Off sign.
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Parents please don't name your baby when you're drunk
Would anyone date your child if they had names like these?
Amber Moenning
Anita Hoare
Chris Klitgaard
Cookie Munster
Craven Dick
Dr. Harry C. Beaver
Gae Hooker
Harry Hooker
Harry Kok
Hugh Willie
Ima Hogg
Ima Goodman
Jack Schitt
Jim Laucher (pronounced locker)
Jim Shu
Jim Sox
Jo King
Long Harden
Nelson Arse
Philip Hiscock
Richard Finder (aka Dick Finder)
Richard Hertz (aka Dick Hertz)
Richard Holder (aka Dick Holder)
Richard Hunter (aka Dick Hunter)
Robin Banks
Willie Stroker
I don't even dare list some Cantonese and Hokkien names that have weird English meanings.
Just remember that your child needs his or her social life and would prefer to grow up without a name-induced psychological disorder.
Amber Moenning
Anita Hoare
Chris Klitgaard
Cookie Munster
Craven Dick
Dr. Harry C. Beaver
Gae Hooker
Harry Hooker
Harry Kok
Hugh Willie
Ima Hogg
Ima Goodman
Jack Schitt
Jim Laucher (pronounced locker)
Jim Shu
Jim Sox
Jo King
Long Harden
Nelson Arse
Philip Hiscock
Richard Finder (aka Dick Finder)
Richard Hertz (aka Dick Hertz)
Richard Holder (aka Dick Holder)
Richard Hunter (aka Dick Hunter)
Robin Banks
Willie Stroker
I don't even dare list some Cantonese and Hokkien names that have weird English meanings.
Just remember that your child needs his or her social life and would prefer to grow up without a name-induced psychological disorder.
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Amazing Race Lessons: Are Asians Cheaper?
I've been pondering about the race economics.
Winners of The Amazing Race get US 1 million.
Winners of The Amazing Race Asia get US 100,000.
Both races are are equally punishing.
I assume both series are broadcast to the world audience. Ok lets say I'm wrong and TARA is broadcast only in Asia. The number of people living within AXN Asia's broadcast range (hence viewership hence ad dollars) is at least equivalent to the US audience size wouldn't you say?
And the chief sponsors of the show aren't to be sniffed at either. Sony's still a leading global brand last time I checked although I'm not so sure about the other sponsors like that Lagoon Resort thingy.
So does anybody know why TARA's prize money is pegged at one-tenth the value in the US?
Would the Americans come to the party if the prize money was only US 100,000?
If they don't, then what does that say about Asians?
Come to think of it, if we're asked to pay to get into such a race, would we?
Just thinking out loud.
Winners of The Amazing Race get US 1 million.
Winners of The Amazing Race Asia get US 100,000.
Both races are are equally punishing.
I assume both series are broadcast to the world audience. Ok lets say I'm wrong and TARA is broadcast only in Asia. The number of people living within AXN Asia's broadcast range (hence viewership hence ad dollars) is at least equivalent to the US audience size wouldn't you say?
And the chief sponsors of the show aren't to be sniffed at either. Sony's still a leading global brand last time I checked although I'm not so sure about the other sponsors like that Lagoon Resort thingy.
So does anybody know why TARA's prize money is pegged at one-tenth the value in the US?
Would the Americans come to the party if the prize money was only US 100,000?
If they don't, then what does that say about Asians?
Come to think of it, if we're asked to pay to get into such a race, would we?
Just thinking out loud.
Sunday, April 8, 2007
7 habits of highly annoying bosses (and employees)
This is my very own list of habits of annoying bosses.
1. Indecision and refusal to make decisions.
2. Putting the blame on you even though they were the one who decided to proceed.
3. Blatant favoritism.
4. Cluelessness.
5. Manipulativeness.
6. Badmouthing their own staff to others.
7. Management by intimidation / terrorism.
And for annoying employees:
1. Cluelessness.
2. Demand recognition for activity not result.
3. Laziness.
4. Clock-watching (leave at 5pm sharp).
5. Calculative boundary watching (that's not my job syndrome).
6. Don't care attitude
7. Too emo & taking things personally.
A boss should remember that his head will be "chopped off" if his staff doesn't get the work done.
An employee should remember that he's screwed if the boss doesn't think he deserves a promotion or raise.
Moral of the story? A boss shouldn't think he's god because his own godfathers won't be around permanently to protect him. An employee shouldn't behave like he's the devil because even devils need to eat. Both need each other so if they're smart they won't screw around with one another. Well actually you can but the past catches up with you. Always.
This post is dedicated to my friend Ernie in the Middle who's grappling with nasty bosses up there and clueless staff down there.
1. Indecision and refusal to make decisions.
2. Putting the blame on you even though they were the one who decided to proceed.
3. Blatant favoritism.
4. Cluelessness.
5. Manipulativeness.
6. Badmouthing their own staff to others.
7. Management by intimidation / terrorism.
And for annoying employees:
1. Cluelessness.
2. Demand recognition for activity not result.
3. Laziness.
4. Clock-watching (leave at 5pm sharp).
5. Calculative boundary watching (that's not my job syndrome).
6. Don't care attitude
7. Too emo & taking things personally.
A boss should remember that his head will be "chopped off" if his staff doesn't get the work done.
An employee should remember that he's screwed if the boss doesn't think he deserves a promotion or raise.
Moral of the story? A boss shouldn't think he's god because his own godfathers won't be around permanently to protect him. An employee shouldn't behave like he's the devil because even devils need to eat. Both need each other so if they're smart they won't screw around with one another. Well actually you can but the past catches up with you. Always.
This post is dedicated to my friend Ernie in the Middle who's grappling with nasty bosses up there and clueless staff down there.
Manglished
While its normal for the ordinary joe to mispronounce spoken English, I think its appalling when our radio and TV professionals do it. This little exchange on radio happened some time ago. I won't mention the station ID.
DJ (excited): Correct!! And the weiner of the contest is.... Bryan!!!!
Bryan (shocked): What did you call me?
If you must know what a weiner is, its the long brown thing between the buns.
My gf swears the DJ meant "winner" not "weiner" but I wasn't so sure.
If the ads on Astro are any indication, mispronunciations in the media is becoming as common as pisang goreng or is it goreng pisang. Here's a couple more typically mispronounced words.
character: ker-rack-ter
contact: kern-tact
liaise: liars
Oh by the way as mangled as our language is, I've never come across anyone who says "My England not powderful" no matter how ulu they are. I conclude this fancy line only exists in the heads of dumbasses.
Anyway apart from turning us into a laughing stock, inarticulate DJs promote all kinds of bizzare pronunciations to the public, in time turning us into a nation of "ker-ract-ters" who "kern-tacts" and "liars-es" with one another. Now you have to admit that's a little strange coming from a country that takes its language seriously.
But some countries are happy to take a more liberal stance towards comunication. Check out this pic I snapped in Jakarta a few weeks ago.
Chicken bebas pilih?
Chicken, rice, iced lemon tea (small) gloriously spelt out in English on a Bahasa Indonesia ad?
What wouldn't I give to see ads like this in Malaysia :P
DJ (excited): Correct!! And the weiner of the contest is.... Bryan!!!!
Bryan (shocked): What did you call me?
If you must know what a weiner is, its the long brown thing between the buns.
My gf swears the DJ meant "winner" not "weiner" but I wasn't so sure.
If the ads on Astro are any indication, mispronunciations in the media is becoming as common as pisang goreng or is it goreng pisang. Here's a couple more typically mispronounced words.
character: ker-rack-ter
contact: kern-tact
liaise: liars
Oh by the way as mangled as our language is, I've never come across anyone who says "My England not powderful" no matter how ulu they are. I conclude this fancy line only exists in the heads of dumbasses.
Anyway apart from turning us into a laughing stock, inarticulate DJs promote all kinds of bizzare pronunciations to the public, in time turning us into a nation of "ker-ract-ters" who "kern-tacts" and "liars-es" with one another. Now you have to admit that's a little strange coming from a country that takes its language seriously.
But some countries are happy to take a more liberal stance towards comunication. Check out this pic I snapped in Jakarta a few weeks ago.
Chicken bebas pilih?
Chicken, rice, iced lemon tea (small) gloriously spelt out in English on a Bahasa Indonesia ad?
What wouldn't I give to see ads like this in Malaysia :P
Sepang F1 GP: Disappointing
For me, yesterday's race was such a yawn I had to struggle to keep awake after the first half hour.
I had hoped for some rain showers to spice things up. Didn't happen. I had expected Kimi to be more aggressive. Didn't happen. I had expected some wheel-to-wheel banging at the start line. Didn't happen. I had expected some awesome overtaking moves. Didn't happen. Well there was one but one swallow doesn't make a summer. It turned out to be just a uneventful procession of cars with a very predictable ending.
On top of that, the audio quality of the broadcast on Start Sports was absolute crap. The stupid sound engineers cranked up track noise and drowned out the voices of the commentators with the sound of screaming engines. After some annoying minutes trying to hear them above the din, I hit the mute button and watched the race minus the sound. And then I nodded off.
But the most painful part of the GP was seeing the track conditions itself. It was reportedly like hell on earth with track temperatures hitting 59 deg C. Ex driver Narain Karthikeyan described it as driving in an oven. Commentator Steve Slater mentioned searing heat a few times. All drivers who were asked to comment described it as the most punishing circuit of the entire F1 season. You could sense the weariness in everyone.
Now the FIA has always regarded team and spectator comfort as an important criteria in choosing where to host races. Seemingly mundane issues like traffic jams, public parking and lodging have weighed into the decision, putting old favourites like France's Magny Cours and UK's Silverstone on notice.
I have this niggling feeling that when Singapore gets into the calendar, it could spell the end of formual 1 in Sepang because lets face it. Sg's air temperature is 1-2 deg centigrade cooler than Sepang and track temperatures possibly 7-8 degrees lower. A city track has a greater wow factor and promises a higher advertising premium for FIA than a common flat circuit. The benefits of racing on tracks separated by a mere couple of hundred kms may not justify the cost if the demographics are almost identical. If that happens it would be a shame. Well that's just my speculation.
Ho hum. Bahrain GP next week had better be more exciting.
I had hoped for some rain showers to spice things up. Didn't happen. I had expected Kimi to be more aggressive. Didn't happen. I had expected some wheel-to-wheel banging at the start line. Didn't happen. I had expected some awesome overtaking moves. Didn't happen. Well there was one but one swallow doesn't make a summer. It turned out to be just a uneventful procession of cars with a very predictable ending.
On top of that, the audio quality of the broadcast on Start Sports was absolute crap. The stupid sound engineers cranked up track noise and drowned out the voices of the commentators with the sound of screaming engines. After some annoying minutes trying to hear them above the din, I hit the mute button and watched the race minus the sound. And then I nodded off.
But the most painful part of the GP was seeing the track conditions itself. It was reportedly like hell on earth with track temperatures hitting 59 deg C. Ex driver Narain Karthikeyan described it as driving in an oven. Commentator Steve Slater mentioned searing heat a few times. All drivers who were asked to comment described it as the most punishing circuit of the entire F1 season. You could sense the weariness in everyone.
Now the FIA has always regarded team and spectator comfort as an important criteria in choosing where to host races. Seemingly mundane issues like traffic jams, public parking and lodging have weighed into the decision, putting old favourites like France's Magny Cours and UK's Silverstone on notice.
I have this niggling feeling that when Singapore gets into the calendar, it could spell the end of formual 1 in Sepang because lets face it. Sg's air temperature is 1-2 deg centigrade cooler than Sepang and track temperatures possibly 7-8 degrees lower. A city track has a greater wow factor and promises a higher advertising premium for FIA than a common flat circuit. The benefits of racing on tracks separated by a mere couple of hundred kms may not justify the cost if the demographics are almost identical. If that happens it would be a shame. Well that's just my speculation.
Ho hum. Bahrain GP next week had better be more exciting.
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
7 habits of annoying callers
1. They ring u once, hang up and expect u to call back. And if you don't, they harrass you by repeating it every few minutes for the whole hour.
2. They don't identify themselves and start talking as soon as you pick up the phone. They assume you know who they are and that you're free to talk even if its 2am.
3. They ring u up, keep silent and wait for you to say something first.
4. After being told its the wrong no, they promptly cut off the line without apologizing.
5. They call u and hang up as soon as they hear your voice because they couldn't recognize it.
6. They call you, somehow get the line dropped in the middle of the conversation and then later tick you off because YOU didn't call them back.
7. They call you and immediately ask "who's that?" without even bothering to introduce themselves. The worst is those who promptly cut the line as soon as you tell them who you are.
If you have any of these habits, don't call me :P
2. They don't identify themselves and start talking as soon as you pick up the phone. They assume you know who they are and that you're free to talk even if its 2am.
3. They ring u up, keep silent and wait for you to say something first.
4. After being told its the wrong no, they promptly cut off the line without apologizing.
5. They call u and hang up as soon as they hear your voice because they couldn't recognize it.
6. They call you, somehow get the line dropped in the middle of the conversation and then later tick you off because YOU didn't call them back.
7. They call you and immediately ask "who's that?" without even bothering to introduce themselves. The worst is those who promptly cut the line as soon as you tell them who you are.
If you have any of these habits, don't call me :P
Tuesday, April 3, 2007
Sunday, April 1, 2007
Mr Know It All
Do you have friends who has the answer to everything?
I have a few. They are high IQ people who never say "I don't know". If you want to know how the toilet works or why people fart, go ask them.
They are the real-life embodiment of Dexter of the cartoon series Dexter's Lab who has an explanation and technological answer to every problem in his life.
Would I want to know how everything works, to know everything there is to know?
To me that's kind of like asking do I want my presents wrapped up or in a transparent box. What, and give up the fun of tearing the wrapper off and opening it up? No thank you. Sometimes its more fun not to know.
Another friend of mine whom I'll call Mr Porn King shares my thoughts. Well, sort of. He said the sexiest girls are the ones that doesn't bare all. Its the wondering what's inside, the fun of discovery that makes it all the more alluring he says.
Hmmm, great minds think alike?
I have a few. They are high IQ people who never say "I don't know". If you want to know how the toilet works or why people fart, go ask them.
They are the real-life embodiment of Dexter of the cartoon series Dexter's Lab who has an explanation and technological answer to every problem in his life.
Would I want to know how everything works, to know everything there is to know?
To me that's kind of like asking do I want my presents wrapped up or in a transparent box. What, and give up the fun of tearing the wrapper off and opening it up? No thank you. Sometimes its more fun not to know.
Another friend of mine whom I'll call Mr Porn King shares my thoughts. Well, sort of. He said the sexiest girls are the ones that doesn't bare all. Its the wondering what's inside, the fun of discovery that makes it all the more alluring he says.
Hmmm, great minds think alike?
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